The Present Moment

“We have to learn to live in the Present Moment.

We have to ask God: What are You calling me to do now, in this Present Moment?

Not yesterday or tomorrow, but right now. 

God's will is manifested to us in the duties and experiences of the Present Moment.

We have only to accept them and try to be like Jesus in them.” Mother Angelica

Our youngest daughter greets me every time I pick her up from her crib, with a kiss on my shoulder and pats on my back. She’s our fourth babe in less than five years and through these eight months with her, the Lord has worked hard in helping me relinquish control of schedules and my “idea” of what motherhood should look like.

A few months ago, I was struggling. I felt like everything was piling up and I was on the outside watching it fall. There were days when I couldn’t focus, I couldn’t gather up the energy to get off the sofa, and was so deeply overwhelmed by the season I would cry. By the grace of God, I spoke up and confided in my husband, sister, and close friends. I was suffering from a mix of postpartum depression and anxiety and fear was very present.

I wrote down a passage from the book of Psalms, “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff comfort me.” This passage (along with the Eucharist, many Rosaries, prayers, and intercessory prayers from a few holy friends, Sts. Gianna, Zelie, & Therese) gave me hope and courage to hold on to.

Through this surrender to the Lord, my heart and mind were opened to healing. There have been many sins and wounds uplifted in the garden of my heart (pride, perfectionism, self-reliance, insecurity). And Jesus, through His grace and mercy, has been planting deeper roots to bear fruit in this season of my vocation - security, surrender, trust, and rest. 

The present moment can be hard to surrender to. Especially in a society that is consistently pushing for life to be busy and quick. But the Lord, in His goodness, tells us we can have a fullness of joy (Psalm 16:11). He tells us there is hope among the trials (Romans 8:28). That we can have transformation (Romans 5:3-5). And He will restore and renew all our brokenness (Philippians 1:5).

As Mother Angelica said, “God's will is manifested to us in the duties and experiences of the Present Moment.” He is asking us to trust in His providence. To rest upon His Sacred Heart.

Only through Him and with Him, will we find peace and joy in the present moment. Like a baby in her momma’s arms 🩷

I wrote the Litany for Postpartum after having our daughter back in November. It has been a prayer that I've gone to many times a week to seek God's grace and ask for the Blessed Mother to help me grow in virtue. May it bring you peace during your own season of postpartum.